Monday, June 21, 2010


Let's play pretend and say that I never knew where I'd been
Let’s pretend that I stayed home and watched the whole world spin
Pretend I procrastinated and never followed my dreams
That I just sat there and let the real world be what it seems
Pretend I never found the font courier new
That my words and stories could never get to you
That I never took a chance and put the fingers to the keyboard
That I never was a kid watching The Adventures of Harrison Ford
That my main man Will Hunting never followed his dream
And that I never realized that was my number one theme

In life, to do what you were put here for
It's that purpose that's knocking right at your door
Those who never took a risk will never know what they missed
If you can’t open the door you gotta knock it back with your fist

It’s that imagination that inspired creation upon the realization you got at the train station laying the foundation while you looked at your location and future destination of your soon to be vocation; and no frustration, deflation, stagflation, stagnation, taxation, or even starvation would deprive you, of your flirtation and formation of your goal in life, creating the narration with proper quotation of a purpose with a long duration

But hold on wait a minute, I've gone off track
Let's take a reverse step and push playback

So let’s pretend that I never really looked within
Never really saw where everything did begin
That I never really found out this tested quest
That I wasted each and every day because I was just so stressed
Asking the questions to see if anything was truly blessed
That I never figured out what I possessed
To help me fulfill this lifelong quest

Let’s pretend that I didn’t write monologues in all of my classes
That I took proper notes and got all passes
Pretend I didn’t change my name because no one could say it
It wasn’t now Cotti; a name that just a bit did quite fit
Pretend that I never took that tipping walk to hear Cromwell talk
That I slept in during dead week avoiding the blaring alarm clock
And you never auditioned for those one act plays
Everyone thinking it was just a waist of your days
“You should be studying business to land that corner office”
But that dream just wouldn't suffice
It would be like dry brown rice
That I ate in college cause protein powder was just too high in price
But I had to get the bulk of the method actor
For the character of the spec script that wouldn't be a factor
For many long years until the script was trite and true
Until it would be the thing that I knew I would always do

So let’s go back to the start, and pretend I didn't come from the valley
A place where if it were a baby, it would have been dumped in an alley
A place defined by its teen pregnancy and meth rate per capita
Where if I never got outta I woulda been a has been coulda been shoulda
But I did, and now I'm doing my own thing
With its very own zip, zealer, and zing

But I never could've done any of this
If it wasn't for, that very first risk

new look of the summer

What the future holds just got a little face-lift.

Still a little more to be done but I think it's good for right now.

Today is the first day of summer and even thought I've been out of school for two weeks now until this week is over it'll still only seem like one.


Yes, because as of right now I'm working the a gun club job score-keeping for the state tournament. 6-8 hot hours in the sun everyday for minimum wage, but hey I gotta get that revenue stream flowing if I ever want to do anything / go anywhere.

So the sis said that I need to write on here more and I totally agree. It is the summer and I have already been slacking on the posts (just like last year), but I'm gonna change that.

I got something special coming in a few hours.

Stay tuned...

Monday, June 7, 2010

the king

Here is a brief summary of the play I read yesterday:

There once was a king by the name of Lear,
Many thought he had nothing to fear
But he was getting old and about to retire,
So he divided the throne among his three daughters before he would expire
He did just that but only two liars got their wish
But revenge would be a cold, cold dish
They fought for the throne while Lear watched in dismay
He walked out into the storm, his mind in disarray
The ones that hid themselves found him and took him in
But he was now just a shell of the man he once had been
The cold, cold dish took hold over the others
Leaving death and destruction in its path, crowning the new king the more righteous of brothers.

Saturday, June 5, 2010


Well that's it.

The shows are complete.

Thank you Mr. Cazale, I don't know if learning from you helped my performance tonight, but I would like to think that it did. I believe it helped the overall performances of both plays, because by continuing to think about all the characters it opened more doors and opportunities for everyone. I was even able to suggest a few blocking actions to the other actors in the play with me, that when they executed them perfectly it just added an extra layer to the cake (the cake being the play).

It's a little sad wrapping up the plays because I feel so close to everyone involved, but at the same time it is good to be done so now I can focus on finals (as much as I don't want to think about them). But the only reason that it feels good to be done is because tonight was our best performances for both plays, and that is exactly the way to end it.

This past week was the most fun I have ever had here at Cal Poly.

The stressful week of fitting in rehearsals, classes, school work, and performances was quite a handful but I made it through and there is no substitute for the feeling. In actuality, the only reason it was stressful was because of the school part. I loved the performances.

There is just no feeling like it, I don't really know how to explain it. I just know I want it back.

So now the next stage in getting this feeling back is...

Antigone, Fall 2010.

I'll keep you posted.

Friday, June 4, 2010

it was you

Had opening night performances tonight. And they went... well.

Upon coming back I watched "I Knew it was You," a documentary about John Cazale.

Wow, am I glad I did. The iconic actors that were interviewed praised him, talking about how much they learned from him and all of the little things he would do to make them better.

He was just so subtle. So brilliant.

I watched "Dog Day Afternoon" during Christmas break, but I haven't seen The Godfathers or "The Deer Hunter" in years (probably since I was about 12, was the first time I watched them, too young? no way). The moral of this story is I need to watch them again.

Al Pacino said in an interview that John Cazale would find out what the pain or fear of his character was. This really struck a cord with me. So simple, yet it opens the door to so many possibilities.


Up next for "what the future holds"...

Well I need to have a movie marathon once this school year is over, AND...

I still have two shows left for tonight, so let's just see if Mr. Cazale is still making actors better.

My guess, is yes.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

week of death

Rehearsals till 11:00 pm

Class at 7:00 a.m.

Midterm at 2:00 p.m.

behind the curtain

I'm back behind the curtain again.

Preview shows tonight.

Then opening performances Thursday.

Closing performances Friday.

It's gonna go quick.