Today I got the script for my first role as an actor. I did not read it right away. I let it sit for a little, let it develop and age.
I read up on Stanislavski before I got the script and what he said about his "system." He talked about it having to be the right conditions when an actor should first read the script, because it is those first impressions that stick with the actor and help build the character and that relationship is so fragile.
After reading the script I thought about the life of my character. Where he was before the events in the play, what he has done, seen, felt, been a part of, where he was coming from and where he may go next.
The character I play is an Ex G.I. so I read up on the day to day life of an American soldier in World War II. I thought about the burdens he has had to face. What it would feel like to get a weekend pass in Paris. I'm watching and listening to old movies and video clips of the forties and fifties to see how people talked, walked, and acted. I put classic World War II dramas into my instant Netflix queue to watch, like From Here to Eternity. I looked at Marlon Brando in early screen tests to see how he talked and carried himself. I looked at James Dean's essence and passion he brought to his performances. Paul Newman's charm and personality he brought with him everywhere he went. I did this because when I read the part that's who I saw in it. The character is a young soldier, but he is an EX G.I., not just a G.I. It is something about the EX part that conveys something different about the character, and I haven't quite figured it out yet. I'm still feeling out where I want the character to go.
Then somehow during all of this I got caught up watching over an hour of youtube clips of Oscar acceptance speeches. I am starting to realize just how hard a successful career in acting is to accomplish.
I do not know if I will ever be able to reach the point in my life where I think I am good enough to do this.
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